


alfreds main dudes (allies + more skype chat)

by thesaltking



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Gay, M/M, Memes, canada is a even HUGER meme, chinas not a meme (yet), daddy memes, except for china, idk yet, its up 4 interpretation, kinda usuk, probably an au, russia is a huge meme, they only use human names in this, they raise their dongers, theyre all memes, this is a huge meme
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-04
Updated: 2016-09-07
Packaged: 2018-08-12 22:10:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7951030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thesaltking/pseuds/thesaltking
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>a huge meme is awaitinf you</p><p>alfredo: @ arthur:<br/>alfredo: IM DELETING YOU, DADDY!]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 10% complete.....]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 35% complete....]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 60% complete....] 99% complete..... ERROR! True Daddies are irreplaceable I could never delete you Daddy! Send this to ten other Daddies who give you cummies Or never get called ☁️squishy☁️ again If you get 0 Back: no cummies for you  3 back: you're squishy☁️ 5 back: you're daddy's kitten 10+ back: Daddy<br/>irl harry potter: honestly im flattered</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> the dongers and daddy memes dont belong 2 me i found them on copypasta

1:45 pm

alfredo added ohohon, irl harry potter, panda luvr, and mother Russia to MY MAIN DUDE BROS. MY HOMIES 4 LYFE  
alfredo: y’all ready 4 this  
irl harry potter: u bloody fuckin  
mother Russia: : )  
ohohon: ivan I hate to say it but that emoticon is very creepy  
panda luvr: wats dis? XD  
irl harry potter: ALFRED FUCKING RESPOND YOU TWAT  
alfredo: I like to raise my Donger I do it all the time ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ and every time its lowered┌༼ຈل͜ຈ༽┐ I cry and start to whine ┌༼@ل͜@༽┐But never need to worry ༼ ºل͟º༽ my Donger's staying strong ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉA Donger saved is a Donger earned so sing the Donger song! ᕦ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕤ  
panda luvr: that’s super random XD  
ohohon: I CANT BELIEVE.  
Irl harry potter: OH HAHAHA TWO CAN PLAY AT THAT GAME ALFRED  
Mother Russia: yes I am in too  
Mother Russia: : )  
Alfredo: ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽YOU CAME TO THE WRONG DONGERHOOD༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽  
irl harry potter: ( ° ʖ ° )つ──☆*:・ﾟ clickty clack clickty clack with this chant I summon spam to the chat ( ° ʖ ° )つ──☆*:・ﾟ  
ohohon: ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ VOICE OF AN ANGEL ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ   
mother Russia: ༼ ºººººل͟ººººº ༽ I AM SUPER DONG ༼ ºººººل͟ººººº ༽   
panda luvr: where r u guys finding these? XD lol  
alfredo: ζ༼Ɵ͆ل͜Ɵ͆༽ᶘ FINALLY A REAL DONG ζ༼Ɵ͆ل͜Ɵ͆༽ᶘ   
panda luvr: XDDDDD  
irl harry potter: ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ༼ຈ ل͜ຈ༽ﾉ☂ ɪᴛs ʀᴀɪɴɪɴɢ sᴀʟᴛ! ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ☂ ヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ、ヽヽ｀ヽ  
alfredo: @ arthur:  
alfredo: IM DELETING YOU, DADDY!]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 10% complete.....]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 35% complete....]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 60% complete....] 99% complete..... ERROR! True Daddies are irreplaceable I could never delete you Daddy! Send this to ten other Daddies who give you cummies Or never get called ☁️squishy☁️ again If you get 0 Back: no cummies for you 3 back: you're squishy☁️ 5 back: you're daddy's kitten 10+ back: Daddy  
irl harry potter: honestly im flattered  
mother Russia: I love swimming in daddies cum he gives me facials with it he makes me feel like a princess so when I heard daddy got a wife I was pissed I thought up a plan‼️I am going to cut the pussy right out of that daddy stealing bitch so I went into her room at 4am and cut her clit I was going to make sure that shit never will work she screamed and cried but I knew I had to do it if I wanted daddy by my side! I made sure to cut her boobs off too and for good measure I poured boiling water all over that bitch before shooting her daddies rock hard cock is the only cock for me  
ohohon: WHAT THE FUCK IVAN  
irl harry potter: NOONONONOO IVAN WHATT HE FU C CK  
alfredo: THIS IS NOT WHAT I WANTE DTO HAPPEN NOPE  
panda luvr: 0_o ....ivan  
ohohon: wait wait..,. yao,,,question??  
Panda luvr: whats up?  
Ohohon: are you usinf XD ironically or   
Panda luvr: I don’t think im using it ironically..? lol  
Ohohon: oh oboy  
Alfredo: *sweats*  
Irl harry potter: same Alfred   
Mother Russia: : )  
Mother Russia: 8 )  
Irl harry potter: IVAN WHATS WITH ALL THESE CREEPY ASS EMOTICONS  
Alfredo: hold on why hasn’t anyone questioned what thjus group chat is  
Irl harry potter: Idk  
Alfredo: ARTHUR I HAVE A QUESTION FOR YOU  
Irl harry potter: if you say ‘what are those’ Im disowning you  
Alfredo: NO Why would I say that that meme is so last year  
Irl harry potter: bloody twat  
Alfredo: anywaYS   
Mother Russia: : U )  
Irl harry potter: ivan youre scaring me  
Alfredo: I actually forgot what im going to say  
Irl harry potter: fucking jesus  
Panda luvr: oh gosh  
Mother Russia: Daddy be nimble Daddy be quick Daddy has a rock hard dick! 1️⃣cummy 2️⃣cummy 3️⃣cummy 4️⃣! Daddy cums so much he can't cum any more! Ghost cummy Ghost cummy don't be scared! There's always more cummies that can be shared! Daddy makes me ☁️squishy☁️ Daddy makes me wet Daddy treats me like his little pet! Send this to 69 TRUE Daddy's or else you'll never get any cummies again ‼️  
Alfredo: N O  
Irl harry potter: ivan I am begging you . please stOPPP  
Mother Russia: : )


	2. memelord canada + fruitcake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> canada is secretly a memelord and some things happen with fruitcake (japan)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> once again i do not own the dongers

2:14 am  
Alfredo: U GUYS DON’T UNDERTSNA D   
Alfredo: wait. Wait hold up. Wait what chat us this  
Alfredo: HWO AM I TALKING TO  
alfredo added MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP to the group.  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: IM HERE AND IM READY FOR THE MEMES IM GOPNNA RAISEMY DONGERS SO FUCKING HIGH YOU DON’T EVEN UNDERTSNA DHOW RESDY I AM FOR THIS REAYD FOR THE FUCKING M E M E P O C A L Y P S E INT HJIS CHAT OHHHHHH HHHHHYEAH  
Alfredo: MATT>?????///I DIDNYT KNOW YOU WERE LIKE THIS????WHENM DID YOU CHOOSE TO SHOW ME THIS SIDE OF YORUSELF  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: in the daytime, im matthieu, just a normal boy, with a normal life, but theres something about ,me no one knows yet cause I have a secret  
Ohohon: DIDM SOMEONE JUSTR QUOTE MIRACULOUS LADYBUG???>>>?/?CFKJCODRKVCOYESS S SHELLO WHPO ARE YOU  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: ITS ME,, MATT  
Ohohon: waitwait...matt??????  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: yess??  
Ohohon: shit ..,mm,FUCK I cant do this WAIT Who are you WAIT FUCKING HOLD Up never minf   
Ohohon: IM REWAKLKY SORRY I CANT REMEMBER WHO YOU AR3W  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: lmao nobody rly notices me so its cool lol  
Ohohon: I sense sarcasm is that sarcasm or not I just don’t want to hurt anyones feelingds  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: uwu its chill  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: itrs time to  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ ʀᴀɪsᴇ ᴜʀ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀs ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ  
Ohohon: hold up wjeres Alfred  
Irl harry potter: hello there  
Irl harry potter: oh my god another meme  
Alfredo: MATT I DIDN’T KNPW YOU WERE LIKE THIS,..,  
Alfredo: I THOUGHT YOU WERE PURE,,,,,,,,,,,WHOLESOME,,,FRUIT CAKE  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: bitch u thought B^)  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: waitr did you just call me a gay man  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: not that im not but  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: ???  
Alfredo: wait fruitcake is slang 4 gay ,man  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: yeea  
Alfredo: oh no  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: wha.t?  
Alfredo: DOES THJAT MEAN ALL THIS TIME IVE BEEN CALLING KIKU a GAY MAN  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: OHMYYOG D NONONOO WAY  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: hahahHAHAHAHA OH,MYGOD   
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: DID HE NEVER CORRE CT YOU??>>? AHSHHAS  
Alfredo: IVE FUCKJIED U P  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CALLED HIM FRUITCAKE  
Alfredo: FUCKIGN YESTERDAY  
Alfredo: “hey ya fruitcake” WAS WHAT I SAID TO START THE SENTENCE   
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: hsahahahHSAHAHA OHMYO D  
Ohohon: SaLUT WHAT DID I MISS   
Ohohon: ALFRED OH MON DIEU  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP added sunrise land to the group.  
Alfredo: MATTHIEU NO  
Alfredo: WHAT HAVE YOU DONE  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: THJERES NO TURNING BACK NOW  
Sunrise land: hello ?  
Sunrise land: excuse me what is this?  
Sunrise land: oh hi matthieu...alfred?  
Alfredo: hhhey kiku  
Alfredo: wassup  
Sunrise land: nothing?  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: ALFREDS BEEN CALLING YOU A GAY MAN  
Sunrise land: oh ...yeah he does oh  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: ALFRED  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: ALKFRD WHEREW ARE YIOU  
Ohohon: OH MON DIEU JE SUIS CriAIS HAHAH EN AUCUNE fAçON hHAH  
Irl harry potter: MY PHONE WONT STOP BUZZING EWHAT IS GOING ONJ AND FRANCOIS WHY ARE YOU SCREAMJNGF IN FRENCH  
Irl harry potter: BLIMEY ALFREDCO NVGKPVKJCLONK  
Alfredo: IM LEAVING THE PLANET   
Alfredo: IM GOJG N TO GO LIVE ON PLUTO  
Alfredo: GOODBYE MY DUDES  
Irl harry potter: ALFRED NO  
Ohohon: OHOHOH MON DIEU ALFRED NE LAISSEZ PA S  
Alfredo: IT WAS NICE KNOWIUNG YOU GUYS   
Sunrise land: Alfred, its nbd don’t worry abt it friend  
Alfredo: wow rly?????  
Alfredo: ur chill abt me calling u a gay ma n ?  
Sunrise land: its not too far off   
Sunrise land has left  
Alfredo: KIKU IS GAY?  
Alfredo: DID KIKU JUST  
Alfredo: SAY HE WAS GAY AND LEFT??????  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: I LITERALLY CANT BREATHE  
Irl harry potter: well that was a ride  
Ohohon: Je pense que je suis fait crier en français maintenant phaja  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: why did u text that in French if u were going to stop  
Ohohon: lol idk


	3. Chapter 3

4:20 am

Mother russia: Blaze it


	4. usuk confirmed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is kinda pointless and i made up a ship name that isnt usuk or libertea or that other one bc theyre prob in an au

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the updates will be kinda slo bc school n stuff but hey its 11:25 pm and im posting thids

8:09 am   
Irl harry potter: good morning you twats  
Irl harry potter: am I the only one awake  
Irl harry potter: hello0  
Irl harry potter: ......  
Irl harry potter: ok I am  
Alfredo: bitch u thought  
Irl harry potter: dammit Alfred  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: heyyy  
Irl harry potter: fuck me   
Alfredo: maybe later  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: HSHYUDSHSDSHSDHDJKDJDSHSHAHASHSHWHAAHAI SHIP IT  
Irl harry potter: kys @ Alfred  
Alfredo: love u too  
Alfredo: <3  
Alfredo: <3  
Alfredo: <3  
Alfredo: <3  
irl harry potter: what are you doing  
alfredo: ur supposed to catch it  
irl harry potter: why tho  
alfredo: um idk its cool  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: otp  
Alfredo: :-D  
Irl harry potter: Alfred you wanker  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP renamed the group alfthur ftw   
Alfredo: o h so u made a ship name  
Irl harry potter: dhfnmvkvc  
Irl harry potter: alfthur  
Alfredo: im kmss  
Irl harry potter: same  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: same  
Ohohon: same  
Mother Russia: same  
Panda luvr: same  
Alfredo: WHEN DID U GUYS GET HERE  
Ohohon: ive been watching sexual tension build between you two for a while ;3  
Mother russia: I just got here   
Panda luvr: me 2 lol  
Irl harry potter: im going to slit my wristS  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: *crawling in my skin in the distance*  
Alfredo: you fuckig e,mo  
Irl harry potter: yes. I am the most emo. I am the emoest of the emo  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: do u listen to the emo trinity  
Alfredo: ^^^^^^^  
Irl harry potter: shit  
Irl harry potter: I do  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: WHEN I WAS  
Ohohon: A YOUNG BOY  
Alfredo: MY FATHER  
Irl harry potter: TOOK ,ME INTO THE CITY  
Panda luvr: TO SEE A MARCHING BAND  
Mother Russia: HE SAID SON WHEN  
Alfredo: HE SAID SON WHEN YOU GROW UP  
Irl harry potter: WILL YOU BE  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: WILL YOU BE  
Alfredo: THE SAVIOUR  
Panda luvr: THE SAVIOR OF THE BROKEN  
Irl harry potter: THE BEATEN AND THE DAMNED  
Alfredo: THJE BEATEN  
Mother Russia: THE BEATEN  
MAPLE FUCKING SYRUP: this just kinda fucked itself up ngl  
Irl harry potter: true  
Alfredo: IM GONNA MAKE YOU BEND AND BREAK  
Irl harry potter: shit  
Ohohon: SAY A PRAYER BUT LET THE GOOD TIMES ROLL  
Mother Russia: IN CASE GOD DOESN’T SHOW  
Panda luvr: (let the good times roll)  
Irl harry potter: Im DONE W/ U A;LLL  
Irl harry potter: YOU ALL KNOW THAT I LISTEN TOI THE TRINITY  
Irl harry potter: time to go to hot topic and wear thick eyeliner


End file.
